What does this mean to take care of myself. We often define our needs in reference to those around us.
Self care vs self soothing-
Self-care and self-soothing are two different concepts123.Self-care is a longer-term strategy focused on helping you meet your needs. It involves changing habits, which may not feel comfortable in the moment13. Examples of self-care activities include eating nutritious food, going to therapy, or taking care of your finances3.Self-soothing gets you through the moment and is something we do when we’re in a time of stress. It focuses on back-up skills for use within a crisis or when needing support to resist some type of negative urge123. Examples of self-soothing activities include food or eating, shopping, drinking alcohol, or getting that endorphin rush from social media3.
Here are some examples of self-soothing behaviors:
Binge-watching TV
Eating your favorite meal
Treating yourself to a fancy coffee
Exercising or movement
Having an alcoholic beverage
Drug use
Making time for friends and family
Retail therapy
Cuddling up in a cozy blanket
Listening to music on the way to work
Here are some examples of self-caring behaviors:
Exercising or movement
Filling your prescriptions
Getting regular checkups
Eating nourishing foods
Staying hydrated
Going to therapy
Making time for friends and family
Setting up a budget
Practicing meditation or mindfulness regularly
Self-care is not an exact science, since everyone is different. What is self-care to you might not be self-care to your best friend, and vice versa. Self-soothing is also very individualized – it is about what makes that person feel better.
Another important note is that sometimes the things you do to soothe yourself will make self-care harder. If an important part of your self-care routine is setting a budget to follow, but you soothe yourself by shopping when you’re upset, you might find that your go-to way to feel better is interfering with your ability to care for yourself. It’s okay if you find yourself needing to be soothed, but make sure that what you’re reaching for will actually make you feel better instead of making your life harder down the line.
Self-soothing and self-care can both be valuable. In fact, they have both probably helped you out more times than you can count! Sometimes we just need to make ourselves feel better, or we experience a crisis (hello, 2020!) and we need cope however we can. Once we’re through the crisis, and have the mental and physical resources to deal with what’s going on, we can step back and make more room for self-care.
As we move into the next phase we have a deeper understanding of the importance of true need to honor our bodies and honor how we care for them. Physically, energetically and who we let in and out of our mental and physical space.
Caring for our spiritual needs. Spirituality is a personal practice. No matter what path is chosen, they all converge upon something you desire on some level—the need for connection, purpose, and happiness.
A spiritual self-care practice is any ritual that connects you to your true self, the real you. The real you is the raw expression of who you were meant to be and offer this world. It’s energizing, inspiring, and most of all, it feels right. Perhaps you already are experiencing this or maybe have had glimpses of what this might look or feel like. Becoming familiar with how you feel is an important part of being able to navigate through life.
Love this! Self-care is one of the hardest things for me to practice.